Notice and Do: Raise Capable Kids, End Motherhood Burnout, and Lighten Your Mental Load

Sam Kelly

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Book cover for Notice and Do: Raise Capable Kids, End Motherhood Burnout, and Lighten Your Mental Load
Image for variant 9780063460911
Book cover for Notice and Do: Raise Capable Kids, End Motherhood Burnout, and Lighten Your Mental Load
Image for variant 9780063460911

Notice and Do: Raise Capable Kids, End Motherhood Burnout, and Lighten Your Mental Load

Notice and Do: Raise Capable Kids, End Motherhood Burnout, and Lighten Your Mental Load

Sam Kelly

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Description

Lighten your mental load and end mom burnout for good with a new kind of parenting book that teaches your kids to notice what needs to be done at home--and do it--without waiting to be asked.


You're sick of the constant push-and-pull to get your kids to clean (which, let's be real, often ends up with you doing it yourself). With Notice and Do, there's a new way. Through accessible but revolutionary techniques, parenting coach Sam Kelly will teach you how to empower your entire family to share the mental load and proactively contribute at home with eight black and white illustrations and 14 photos.
This proven, research-backed method breaks the cycle of burnout and inequitable partnerships, liberating moms from the burden of being the engine that keeps everything running, and sets your kids up to be self-motivated, resilient adults. With Notice and Do, you will learn:

  • the easy and effective way to teach kids cleaning skills so they can confidently get stuff done on their own
  • how to teach kids to notice what needs to be done, for themselves, as the first step to taking initiative
  • age-specific scripts to get buy-in and action from toddlers-teens (even the resistant ones!)
  • how to show your daughters that shouldering the mental load is not their default setting
  • how to show your sons that they are just as capable of being an aware, proactive team player at home
  • ways to work with kids with ADHD and teenagers without yelling, bribes, or constant micromanaging
  • getting your partner on board so everyone in the family is participating in the invisible labor of managing the home

Say goodbye to the one-mom-show and exhausting chore chart battles and hello to a life-changing whole family team who shares the mental load together and works with you, instead of one that works because of you.

Critical Reviews

"There will be the world before Notice and Do and the world after Notice and Do. A breath of fresh air and hope for families everywhere." - Kristen Bell

"This book is going to change the world. It's phenomenally practical and the best application of the mental load work in action that I have ever seen." - Gemma Hartley, author of Fed Up and No One Loves an Angry Woman

"Busy moms don't need another thing to do--they need other people to step up. Sam's system shifts household responsibility where it belongs: with each member of the family. This is exactly what we all need right now." - Liz Tenety, co-founder of Motherly

"I wish my mom had had a Sam Kelly in her generation--someone who speaks boldly, advocates for women, and believes that moms deserve to enjoy their lives. Read this book and buckle up! I never thought one phrase could lead to so much more ease in my life." - Destini Ann, TEDx speaker and author of Very Intentional Parenting

"Rather than adding more to a parent's already full plate, this provides a doable approach that actually helps lighten the load while empowering children to become more capable and independent." - Dr. Siggie Cohen, author of You Are the Parent

"This book is a gift. A practical and inspiring roadmap that has the potential to strengthen kids, support parents, and transform family life." - Tina Payne Bryson, PhD, co-author of The Whole-Brain Child and No Drama Discipline

"Refreshing and will immediately change your home. These concepts started making a difference before I even finished reading! That is how effective they are. Sam is the 'lazy genius' of teaching kids how to share the mental load." - Kendra Adachi, New York Times bestselling author and host of The Lazy Genius podcast

"An essential, actionable toolkit for transforming how we approach the work that runs our lives. Everyone should read this!" - Laura Danger, author of No More Mediocre, @thatdarnchat

"This is the book exhausted moms have been waiting for. It helps kids not only build executive function--it hands the power back to parents in a way that actually feels doable." - Michael McLeod, MA, founder of GrowNOW ADHD, author of The Executive Functioning Playbook

"So much more than just a way to manage housework. This is the simple blueprint that frees mothers suffocating in a do-it-all (by yourself) system and restores belonging and competency to partners and children." - Shelly Miller, MA, child development, @theteachermomma

"The perfect blend of empowering, relatable, and DOable. I felt a shift inside myself from day one of reading. This will be life-changing for any parent who feels like they're drowning." - Mia Wisinski, @playfulheartparenting

"This book is first aid for families. It helps parents see new potential. Life skills with realistic and healthy expectations! It's a better way to live!" - Liesa Card, Sam's mom

"Refreshing and will immediately change your home." - Kendra Adachi, The Lazy Genius

"This book is going to change the world. It's phenomenally practical and the best application of the mental load work in action that I have ever seen." - Gemma Hartley, author of Fed Up and No One Loves an Angry Woman

"I never thought one phrase could lead to so much more ease in my life."

- Destini Ann, parenting coach, author, and Tedx speaker

Publishing Information

Publisher: HarperOne
Pub date: 2026-10-20
Length: 336 pages

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